Just need a place to rant. Somewhere that I belong to. It has been awhile since I last felt like this. What happened just now was exactly what I experienced 2 years ago. Back then, I remember I was so fed up from solving the math questions to the point where I couldn't take it any longer that I just ran to the toilet at the 2nd floor just so I could have some time alone to calm myself down. Today, it happened again. I was trying to complete my unfinished work but was stuck at some questions. I tried referring to the notes + formulas and everything but I just don't know how to do no matter how hard I tried. Again, I felt very upset cause I put in all my effort - to stay focus and concentrate during the whole lecture. Just can't believe I'm actually going thru all this again... I really don't want to be the one who's lagging behind others again anymore. I want to do well. I really have the motivation to study hard and score well for tests/exams. But everything seems to be going against me. I even headed straight back to my room and cried the moment I reached home yesterday cause I was so mentally drained by all the new topics that I've to learn and felt that it was really tough just so my family wouldn't see this side of mine. And today during the lecture, I felt so lost and confused when the lecturer was going too fast that I couldn't even catch up to his speed. That point of time I just dropped my pen and... I gave up. Furthermore, it's only the 2nd day of school... 

This is just the beginning only, I wonder how the days ahead would be like